Aiden: “Knives”

This is "wiL". As in, "I've just lost the wiL to live."

Hooray! Another review up at ZME, this time of the hilariously awful Aiden, and their new album “Knives”. You never really think you could call a band “sub-Papa Roach”, but dagnabbit, never say never.

Jesus Christ. Look, I’m not saying that Aiden are the worst band in the world. But you know that feeling you get when you see a 13 year old boy trying to be rebellious by wearing a lot of black and swearing in a really unconvincing manner, claiming that he’s angry at the whole entire world and is gonna, like, break stuff? That feeling of pure, irrepressible disgust and expasperation? Imagine if the 13 year old boy wasn’t, in fact, 13 years old: rather, he’s 27 years old, and prone to acting like a petulant teenage girl in the middle of a strop if he doesn’t get his way. That’s what Aiden’s Knives is like – just a big, immature hissy fit, playing itself off as some sort of music.

And now imagine that the kid’s name is William Francis, but he calls himself “wiL”. Seriously.

I realise that sounds a lot like a mid-20th Century quinquagenarian proclaiming rock n’ roll to be the devil’s music; it sounds like I’m just too old and embittered to understand why these kids are so angry at the man, man! But no, I’m 21, prone to listening to a good amount of loud guitar music – and I can honestly say, with my hand on my heart and the best of intentions: Stop it Aiden. You’re embarrassing yourselves, and everyone around you. Just stop.

It’s my joint-lowest review score ever!


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